Why I Threatened to Make a Necklace out of Human Hands

Hey y'all. 

Okay, so there are a few things I want to tell you about.

First up
I am one of the Debutantes in Badass Bookie's 2012 Debutante Event! All you need to know is that there will be tons of giveaways of the biggest titles of 2012, ARCs, swag, and each author chooses a prom dress! You can check out the details here.

And next up... actually that Debutante thing was the only thing. It just felt like a few things. Because lately, everything seems bigger than it actually is. Every task more difficult. Every direction more confusing. 

This might be due to the fact that my revision deadline is two weeks away. And then Thanksgiving. And then Christmas. And then Book Launch. Plus Kid B and Kid C's birthdays in the middle of all that.

Sam said to me this morning: "Kid C has to bring a collection to Scouts today. There has to be at least 10 of whatever he's collecting, and it has to be organized somehow."

me (vacant stare): "Um... okay. So?"

Sam: "So... what should he collect?"

me: "Um... bread?"

Sam (long pause): "Lemme explain again. Kid C has to bring a collection to Scouts. Of something he can actually collect. Something that won't, like, mold and stuff. What can we throw together?"

me (looking around kitchen): "Um... light bulbs."

Sam: "No."

me (eying sink): "Water?"

Sam: "Now you're not even trying."

me (staring at cups): "Water spots?"

Sam (waving a hand slowly in front of my face)

me (watching his hand): "Hands! Good idea. He can collect hands. He can string them together and make a necklace."

Sam (backing away slowly): "Um... It's okay. I'll figure it out."

me (calmly): "But you might need help. With the chopping. And you're gonna need my soldering iron to seal the ends of the veins and stuff."

I looked up, but Sam was gone. Truthfully, I have no desire to make a necklace of hands. But at the time it seemed easier to fake crazy than to actually help Kid C with his collection.

Anyone else feeling the stress right now?