Thing About Me #17, and Naked Mondays

Favorite moment from this week so far:

Kid C came home from school with his shirt off. Tried to convince me Mondays were “Naked Day” at school.

Biggest Brain Dead Moment:

I had to read this headline from the newspaper about 100 times before the sentence sounded right.

“Gmail Outage Deprives Millions of Email”

Anyone else?

One More Notch in the Longest 25 Things About Me Tag in the World.

Since we have a lot of new blog readers, I thought we should make some headway in the “Longest 25 Things about me Tag in the History of the World.”

We are on #17. Here’s a recap for the newbies. (I’ve never consolidated the list before. Looking at it, I wonder why I even bother.)


1. I'm a girl.

2. I'm a dork

3. I skipped this one, because I had to brush my teeth.

4. I skipped this one, because I was coming back from brushing my teeth.

5. I beat up Sam in his sleep.

6. Wooo Hoo! Only 845 more to go!

7. I pee, like, 15 times before I go to bed.

8. I'm a hypochondriac.

9. Really, number 8 should count for two, because it's such a big part of my life.

10. I have a very paranoid relationship with food in my fridge.
I found this meat in my freezer on Monday. Date: November 2005. 2005. 2005.

11. I talk to signs. I get angry at them.

12. Ummm…

13. Walked out of “I love you, Man” because I was offended. Saw “Watchmen” instead.

14. Spring forward to #15, for daylight savings.

15. Let me know if we’re in a fight. Otherwise, I’ll never know.

16. I like to drain pus.

Wow. Lame.

Observations from the list so far:
a. I’m not very likable.
b. I’m not very creative.
c. I’m incredibly lazy.
d. I’m kinda gross.

Moving on…
Thing about me #17

My brain is unable to process things, like details.

I know some of you are thinking, “If it can’t process details, WTH does it do?” Which is a very good question. One for a later post.

My friends know this about me, and often say things like, “Don’t worry, I’ll send you an email about it later.”

Segue: Anywho, my good friend Cath has 5 kids ages 4 and under.

Let me repeat. FIVE KIDS ages FOUR AND UNDER!

This wrinkle in the universe was made possible by two sets of twins (2 year olds and newborns).

I’ve been meaning to do something for her for like, forever. But I suck. So after three months of prompting myself, I finally made the effort.

I decided to go to Costco, and pick up whatever she needed. Because I can always find something I need at Costco.

I stopped by, and she told me she needed bacon. Because what young mother doesn’t?

I go to Costco. Find a few baubles for myself. Two hundred dollars later, I’m on my way back to Cath’s house.

2 blocks away, as I’m twisting around so I can pat myself on the back, I make a sinking realization.

No bacon.

All she asked for was bacon. I went to Costco specifically to get the bacon for her. Spent 200 dollars. Forgot the Rakkin Frakkin bacon!

I would’ve gone back, but my warped psyche will not allow me to go shopping twice in one day. (That should totally be #18. I hate shopping!)

Sorry, Cath. We’ll try it again next week, shall we?

Friday Preview: I have way too many books, most of them autographed. So, starting Friday, we will have weekly blog contests. Stay tuned!