So, on this Wednesday, of a particularly long week, I'd like to talk about waiting. I know many of you are in the middle of talking to/submitting to/querying to many prospective agents/editors/publishers, and if you've had a taste of the process at all, you know there's a lot of waiting involved.
Waiting.
Waiting.
And then some more waiting.
So, I thought I'd share with you some of my techniques to pass the time while you're waiting. (Let me preface this by saying, I also read books and work on other projects. On occasion, I even feed the kids. But sometimes, I'm just waiting.)
1. Solitaire
The other day, I reached 666 wins. I'm not normally a superstitious person, but you can bet I stayed up the extra two hours that night until I turned that win number to a more appropriate 667.
15.7 win percentage. 4,279 games played. As the Marines say, Hoo Wah.
(Of course, when they are yelling it as they invade countries, I'm sure they're thinking, "America rules!" and probably not, "Did you see that chick post the 15.7 win percentage? Hooo Wahhh!"
2. Turn your book into a cheesy, lego-like cartoon trailer.During one wait last year, I made a cartoon preview for my first book Echo, just for my own kicks and giggles. Here it is:
3. Write a Song... and then record yourself singing it.
And this is the one colossal waste of time I can't believe I'm about to share with you. But, in honor of American Idol starting up, and those sad sacks that crashed and burned last night in front of all of the country, I shall push forward.
During one of my more manic waiting periods, I wrote a song. (A "Manic Wait" is the same as a "Wait", only with more pills.)It's about writer's block. And I wrote it to the tune of that classic Suzanne Vega song "Tom's Diner".
If that wasn't embarassing enough, I recorded my own version of WRITER'S BLOCK. Me singing.
Those of you who've met me in person know my speaking voice resembles a chipmunk with two acorns shoved up his nostrils. Well, my singing voice is even better.
Since it's humiliating and just plain really really bad, I thought it would be perfect for my blog. I've also included the lyrics, in case you can't understand my singing. Unfortunately, the GarageBand application on my Mac makes my voice very clear. Again, this is unfortunate.
So, below, I present to you... Brodi Ashton, singing WRITER'S BLOCK, to Tom's Diner. (The lyrics are included below. You can sing along. Just follow the bouncing ego.)
I am sitting in my bedroom
Told my hubby this is “working”I am waiting for the answers To my villain’s motivationsAnd it’s hard to concentrateAnd before I even know itI am looking out the windowAre those doggies walking by?(Doo doo’s)Then I head to the storeFamily says I need to feed themAnd I watch for inspirationMaybe it’s around the cornerThere’s a guy at the counterAnd he’s looking kind of iffyMaybe he’s got superpowersAnd he’ll make a good villain(doo doo’s)Do his eyebrows knit together?How do eyebrows “knit together”?I opened up the fileOh this dialogue it is clichéWho writes this sappy drivel?Oh yeah, that would be me.And I’m turning to the keyboardAnd I’m writing random lettersWhen I’m feeling someone watching meOh yay, it’s the mailman!There’s a letter meant for meIs my agent gonna drop me?There’s a woman on the outside from my churchDoes she see me?No she does not really see meCuz I’m hiding ‘neath the counterAnd I’m thinking it’s okay cuz I swear I’m on a rollOnly thirty thousand more wordsIt’s like I’m almost doneNow I’m jumping with my sonDid you see the way my arm moves?Writer’s block it will continue through the morning as I’m listening for the voice of revelation…I don’t hear it even nowAnd maybe now I hear itBut it’s telling me my book sucksI look at the clockIt’s time to go to bedAre you wondering how in the world I have such time to waste? Well, let me tell you, It's not easy, but I can waste time with the best of them. Give me an hour, and no matter how busy I am, I guarantee you I can waste it.
How about y'all? What do you do to pass the time?
