Showing posts with label kid b. Show all posts
Showing posts with label kid b. Show all posts

My Deepest Wish, and a Fairly Accurate Portrait of Kid B

The other day, Kid B was asked to draw a self-portrait. Here's what he came up with:


I think it's pretty accurate. He does have a head. He most definitely has two feet. And sometimes he wears stripes. 

You might not think a kid could resemble the picture above, but I would argue that you haven't met my husband. His genes include: short legs, green feet, and no arms. (No offense to my in-laws!)

Speaking of awesome things, you have until Sunday to tweet a sentence using the words EVER, GLIMMER and SLIDE to enter to win a package of three ARCs: EVERNEATH by this girl, SLIDE by Jill Hathaway, and GLIMMER by Phoebe Kitanidis. Remember to include the hashtag #3arcs. Details here

So, I heard that on 11/11/11, at 11:11 (am or pm) you get to make a wish. I'm wishing for a better year for my boyfriend Rafa. And by boy, I mean man, and by friend I mean lover. 
What? You think I just wasted a wish? Fine. I wish for world peace too. 
What are you wishing for today? Be honest. This is for prosperity.

I'm Back on the Blog, and I brought a Friend, who is really good at Counting Down to EVERNEATH

Hey y'all.

I am emerging from the writing cave! It is bright out here.

Here's what's been going on since we last talked.

1. Um... I've been writing.

And I have to say the sequel to EVERNEATH is coming along. Which is good because it's due tomorrow.

2. EVERNEATH comes out in four months. FOUR MONTHS! And three days. THREE DAYS!

And if you're like me, and you have trouble counting backward from the higher numbers like 8, I have the perfect thing for you.

Presenting... the EVERNEATH countdown widget! I shall call him Widgy, and we shall play and play.



Would you like Widgy for your own blog sidebar? Then you are in luck. All you have to do is press on the doohickee at the bottom of Widgy and then there will be some sort of html code-a-ma-thingee that you can add to your blog. 

Sorry for all the technical terms. Many thanks to Katie Wood Ruffin who was kind enough to make Widgy.

3. I sent my youngest, kid B off to Kindergarten. 



Could he possibly look any smaller?
I always make fun of those moms who shed a tear when their kids make it to kindergarten. Monday was no exception. I had the best insults at the ready.

But my censure of those moms was muffled by the snot draining from my nose and the waterworks running from my eyes.

All my excellent jabs toward them were interrupted by sniffles, and the delivery was stifled, and eventually those other wimpy moms just walked away, and I ran after them, blowing my nose on my shirt and slipping on my own tears, because they had to know that this was supposed to be a day of celebration, and they were being ridiculous.




My kindergartener.
The final blow was when Kid B, who has a difficult time talking, looked at me as I was leaving, and said, "I go home now?"

And I said, "No. You get to stay and have fun."

And he looked all around the classroom - so unsure of everything going on - and then back at me and said, "No, I go home now."

So I ripped open my chest and handed him my beating heart, and told him to hold on to it until we were together again.

He ended up having a great day. And they only lost him once. Yeah, true story. It's awesome when other moms in the neighborhood tell you, "Hey! My kid said they lost kid B!" And you're the last to know...

So, dear friends, what's going on with you? Thank you so much for being nice to the guest bloggers, Sam and my mom. They felt so at home, they begged to blog some more.

The Power of a Picture Book

It may look like just a book...
OH, DADDY! by Bob Shea


But it's not. It's really magic.


Because this kid...
Kid B. Pulling a "Bieb". 


...loves OH, DADDY! Loves it.


And every night, as Sam is tucking him in, Kid B reads some of the words in the book. 


Like: 


"Is THIS how you eat carrots?"


"Oh, Daddy! No, THIS is how you eat carrots!"


I hide in the hallway outside his room and listen. Because if you're familiar with Kid B, you know how rare it is to hear him speak.


Often during the day, he is unsure of the right words, and even more unsure of how to put them together. And too soon, he becomes frustrated. Hopeless.


But at night, he is confident in these words. And he speaks them loudly.


It's heaven. 


Do any of your kids respond to a book like this?  

A Flash Forward to the Future for Kid B, and Why I Cried Yesterday

Hey y'all. Yesterday marked The End of the Chimichanga Challenge:


Team Tamale (me): 25,641 words in 21 days.


Team Gluten Intolerant (Bree Despain): Excellent progress, until a trip to Disneyland sidelined her.


Both great showings, but nothing close to the winner...


Team Churro (Kristin Thetford): 40,222 words in 21 days.


That is pretty amazing. So I asked Kristin to share a couple of her favorite lines from her WIP (Work In Progress):



As soon as I received that black envelope, I knew it would be bad.
I wasn't wrong.

I approach the girl in front of me. "You do know that you will most likely be killed."
She nods, and her smile is a sinister twist of thin lips. "I was born for this."

He knows that, despite my ultimate goal, I will have nightmares over what I have done here.


Pretty engaging lines, don't you think? So, if you get a chance, give her a holla in the comments. I will be personally mailing her the grand prize, which is a burrito. Why not a chimichanga, you ask? Well, because burritos are healthier, and I don't have a deep fat fryer. 

On to the post. 

I had a brush with the future yesterday. Kid B is graduating from his special needs preschool, and they sent us this photo to commemorate the event:

 

They obviously explained the solemnity of the occasion to little Kid B. He looks like he's 5 going on 18 in this picture. I imagine it went like this:

Picture taker: "Okay, Kid B. Try to look like you never had any fun."

Kid B: "But I want to smile!"

Picture taker: "Play time is over! Real adults never smile."

Kid B: "But I'm five!"

Picture taker: "Not for long! You see that thing around your neck? That's called a tie. And it's never coming off! Mwah ha ha ha ha."

I don't know how they got him in a shirt and tie. I can only imagine the whole get-up is an all-in-one sort of thing that they threw over him in the last minute.

What I do know is this: I am so not ready for him to grow up. 

This is a new feeling for me. I never understood those mothers who cried on the first day of kindergarten. I was always the crazy neighbor raising my Diet Coke glass and shouting "Mazel Tov!". Usually, beginning in the labor and delivery room, I start counting down the days til they turn 18 and head off into the world.

I used to wonder why we couldn't be more like animals in the wild. Have the babies, make sure they survive their first week, chew their food for them, and then push them out of their nests to see if they could fly. (Why the baby tigers were in the nest in the first place was always a mystery.)

I even tried to do this at home. First priority was to get them to hold their own bottles. Next was to change their own diapers. Then my master plan was to push them out the door and yell, "Fly, little one. Fly!"

But seeing this picture? *sniff* Really, Pingree School, you're killing me.

The Story to Topple the Story that Topples Star Wars, and Locals can read Everneath early

Hey y'all.

Three Things!

1. If you thought Monday's post had a bargain, wait til you see this. (Thanks to F.O.B. Leisha for pointing this out).

For sale is: The Story to Topple the Story that Topples Star Wars.

And it only costs $53.78 to buy it outright. 

The seller description is pretty funny too, if you want to check it out.

2. Last night, I was working in my study with the door locked. Suddenly Kid B was knocking on the door, saying what sounded like, "Hat! Monny Hat!" Before I could answer, he ran away.
Now, if you are a regular to my blog, you know that Kid B doesn't really talk. So I assumed he was just talking nonsense.  I went out to find him, and apparently, "Hat" was exactly what he was saying. 



Because nobody would want work on their computer while stark naked. That's just wrong.


He's fully nekked otherwise, but at least he has his hat on. Otherwise, it would be embarrassing.

3. Are you in Utah? Do you want to read my book before it comes out?

F.O.B. (Friend of the Blog) Windy Aphayrath is kindly organizing a locals only blogger tour of an ARC of EVERNEATH. (That's my book, in case I haven't mentioned it.) We won't have ARC's for a few months, but I'm dedicating one of my personal copies to this tour!

If you are interested in getting on the list, sign up at her blog: http://windyaphayrath.blogspot.com/2011/03/for-everneath.html.

I'm so grateful she's taking the time to organize this! So go on over and sign up!

That is all. This weekend I'm going to the Utah Blogger/Author Social. Anyone else going?

Anyone new to the blog and you want to introduce yourself? Any lurkers out there want to de-lurk and say "Hi"?
 
Don't be scared. We don't bite. And we're only deadly when it comes to our fish.

My Christmas Break Report: I edited, I swore, and I looked like a Dork

Hey y'all! It's great to be back. I missed you. (Yes, you!)

Things I accomplished over the Christmas break:

1. I edited the boogers out of my manuscript.

It's true. There are no more boogers in it. Now, when it breaths through its nose, there are no more whistling sounds.

2. I only cut myself six times while opening the kids' stupid toys in their stupid packaging. And then I only swore seven times. (An extra one for good measure).

3. I hosted a birthday party for Kid C and about 11 other 8-year-olds at a swimming pool. Because a party isn't a party unless you're risking a life. 
We only like to swim when it's -2 degrees outside.  

(Kid C's birthday party with my husband's family)
Kid C's birthday party with my family. Not quite as big in numbers.

Kid B pointedly NOT swimming

4. Despite having two children who are in their thirties, my mom can still manage to dress us like we're twelve.

Here's us, modeling the presents my mom bought us. 
Yep. Your eyes do not deceive you. She bought us matching hats and scarves, that in turn matched the dog.


5. You wouldn't think someone could pull off looking cool and digging for spare change from the money jar. But Kid C can.
I'm not desperate. I was just sitting here, in my preppy vest, and my hand happened to fall into the money jar. And if I come up with a fistful of coins, I'll just shrug. Whatevs.
 
6. Kid C and Niece N had a sing-off to the tune of "I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas". Nobody died in battle, but some blood was shed. Mostly by the audience, who tried to slit their wrists with wrapping paper.
Battle formations... check.

7. We wore the kids out sledding.

Kid C and Kid B, in a dress rehearsal for the cold weather.

This is no dress rehearsal. It's 2 degrees outside.

Raise a glass... to child labor!

8. The results of number 7:
 Pictures like this stop me from sending Kid B back up the chimney to search for his "real" dad- the fat guy in the red suit.

9. And finally, the ninth thing I accomplished over the holidays...

I made the yuletide gay.

At first, he wanted nothing to do with it, but by the end, he relented.

How was all y'all's holidays?

White Stuff on my Lawn, and Veiled Threats from Kid B's Teacher

Merry hump day.


Well, today I woke up to this in my front yard:

And this in my back:


(I know, every year I think, "This year will be the year I actually dismantle the trampoline...)


I know what it looks like... The Perfect Day for Revising!

But Kid B is home with a "cough". As in, his teachers sent home a subtle note yesterday.

"At the end of the day, Kid B seemed very tired. His nose was runny, and he coughed a bit. He might be getting sick."

If there was a "P.S." on the note, it would not read like this:

"But if he's feeling better tomorrow, send him for sure!"

It would read like this:

"If you send him, and he even clears his throat funny, you will be forever known as THAT MOM WHO SENDS HER SICK KID TO SCHOOL, THEREBY RECKLESSLY INFECTING EVERYONE ELSE. I know what you're thinking... Chances are that he could go to school, and be just fine. But you have to ask yourself one question: do you feel lucky? Punk?"

I don't know if I'm reading too much into it. Sam says I've been known to be a little dramatic. But when I mentioned that Kid B could go to school, and try it out for the morning, a little bead of sweat formed on Sam's forehead, and slowly trickled down his cheek, and fell off his chin, splashing loudly on the kitchen floor, where it pooled, reflecting the concern in Sam's face.

Stop calling me dramatic!

So, how is all y'all's week going? Anyone else out there scared of their kids' teachers?

Kid B Reinvents the Game of Soccer. We're still Working out the Glitches.

So, It's that time of year. Kid B's soccer season has begun again. 

Remember his first game last year?


I think this year we've improved. Check it out:


Did you see him? How about now?

Yep. Kid B's coach told him to "play forward" and Kid B thought he said, "play dead." Common mistake. Could happen to anyone. 

My favorite part of his soccer games is the strange looks he gets:
 The other coach is all, "Is he okay?"

The little girl's all, "Whaaaaa?"

The thing is, neither of them understands Kid B's strategy. He's a road block. Can you imagine if someone is dribbling the ball down the field, and happens to slam into Kid B's blockade? (It's a big field, so there's maybe a 1 in 500 chance it could happen). 

But if it does happen, it would be... maaaaaayhemmmmmmmm! (Said in a monster truck rally voice).

I'm still holding out hope for a soccer scholarship. Hey, if I can get a book deal, he can totally get paid to play soccer.

Prepare to Sing this Blasted Song All Day Long... Starring, Kid B

Howdy.

Kid B started school yesterday, but before he did, he decided to help me make a slideshow of him, so I wouldn't forget him. 

Keep in mind, there are no duplicate pictures. He really did pose for each and every one. Yes, there are quite a few of him yawning, but that's because he saw a preview of himself yawning, and decided he liked that pose the best. 

We set the pictures to his favorite song. And mine. And soon to be yours. (I promise you you'll be singing it all day long.)

Now, every time I miss him, I have this video to turn to.

Twitterpations of a New Relationship... and Why I Won't be up for Mother of the Year.

Good morning, yon bloggerville. 

Thanks for all the congratulations on Friday, and over the weekend. Many of you asked what happens next.  Well, now I get to work on revisions. Michael definitely had the tallest order in terms of plans for the book, so I have a lot of work ahead of me before it's ready to go. 

I feel like last week was a week of speed-dating, where I had a five minute date with each agent. Now we're in the getting-to-know-each-other stage, where I try to put on my best face (I keep it hanging in the closet for special occasions, so it doesn't get too wrinkly), put my best foot forward (the trouble is attaching it... my best foot tends to be a little squeaky) and finally I keep a breath mint handy for all of our phone calls. 

In anticipation of the time I'm gonna have to put in, Sam went on Craigslist and bought the boys Nintendo DS's that actually work. (We had ones that didn't work before, and they couldn't figure out what all the fuss was about. We told them they had to use their imagination to picture what was happening on the screen, and if they were bored, it was because they weren't being creative enough.)

Over the weekend, Kid B walked into the living room, looking like this:
In his left hand the broken DS, in his right the new one, a bottle of milk balanced precariously between his wrists, and still in his underwear at 4:00 p.m. on a Saturday.

Let the neglect begin! 

p.s. Don't judge me.

And to celebrate the new agent, I'm going to reinstitute Free Book Fridays! Watch out this Friday for the first one. Thanks again for all the support, y'all.

Kid B's Soccer Debut... and It ain't Pretty

Kid B started his first soccer games this week. During practice he looked like his namesake, David Beckham. (yeah, we like to put an inordinate amount of pressure on our kids. Kid C is named after Bill Gates.)

Here he is during practice:


Notice he is exemplifying three key strategies to win soccer games:
1. He is running toward the ball.
2. He is pointed in the right direction (i.e. he knows which net is his target)
3. He is aware he's on a soccer field, and appropriately he is running.

Now, check him out during the actual game.

 This is not a summersault. He stayed like this, frozen, for minutes.
We can also learn lessons from this behavior:

1. The other team shouldn't have to question what you're doing.
2. If you're going for the art of distraction, the middle of the field is probably not the best choice, especially with a herd of stampeding 4-year-olds headed your way.
3. If you're going to assume this position, make sure your drawstring is tied tight.

This was the high point of the game, since it was the only time he stayed on the field voluntarily. Maybe it's not too late to change his name to Bob. Nobody expects too much out of a "Bob." Because there are so many of them.

Kid B Makes a Discovery... and Contests Galore!

First, a couple of items of interest... at least to me:

1. Book Reviews:

Hubby Sam reviewed five books at his blog, including Andre Agassi's autobiography and Todd Strasser's Wish You Were Dead. If you like to read, check it out.

2. More Chances for Free Books:

My WIFYR (Writing and Illustrating for Young Readers) contest is open until the end of the month. Basically if you're not signed up for this most excellent conference and you sign up before March 31st, and then you leave me a comment telling me you did, you will be entered in a drawing to win one of five signed books! (Chances are very very good you'll win.)

Also, if you tweet about the contest and the workshop, I'll put an entry in for you.

Tweeting/blogging/facebooking: +1 entry
Signing up: +5 entries

You can leave a comment here telling me your entries, or on the original contest post. Yeah, I know. It's confusing. But not really.

Fellow 6-er and #2 Crazy Emily Wing Smith is holding a contest too. You don't even have to register to enter hers. You can tweet about it or blog about it or other easy stuff.

Another fellow 6-er and #4 Crazy Valynne Nagamatsu is doing a contest too.

And again, fellow 6-er and #5 Crazy Kim Reid is in on the action too.

So basically, you can sign up for the conference (or even leave a comment in some cases) and enter all contests!

Coincidentally, if you sign up for Emily Wing Smith's workshop, you'll be hanging with 1/3 of the 6. If you only sign up for the afternoons (a bargain at $125) you'll meet 5/6 of the 6. Sorry if that's confusing, I just love to use fractions to describe social events.

On to the post...

So, if you've been a long-time reader of the blog, you may have deduced I have a boy with special needs. I don't blog about it a lot, but something happened this week that cracked me up.

(Kid B playing the piano, and his cousin Asher digging for treasure)

When you have a kid with special needs, you celebrate every accomplishment just as you would with an average kid. Their little successes might appear smaller, but they're not. You just have to use the right lens.

So we often find ourselves making announcements  like, "Kid B knows where his ears are!" and "Kid B only sang the alphabet song three times today!"

We celebrate every tiny step forward, and we're lucky that he has teachers who join in the celebration and document his progress in a daily journal. 
Nothing comes easy, and little jobs like potty-training last for years, it seems. The journey is arduous, but not without its moments of levity. 

On Kid B's latest progress report, his teacher wrote:

"B's doing much better on the playground. He's actually exploring the equipment... Instead of just playing with the wood chips."

So, after nearly a year, Kid B noticed the playground housed more than woodchips, and he was excited. And it became a milestone. Like: "By 4 years and 3 months of age, child should discover that woodchips are not the funnest part of the playground." He's right on target.

We laughed so hard. I don't know if this is universally funny, or if it's "special needs" funny, or funny ha ha, or funny wah-wah wah. But it's been two days, and I'm still laughing, so I thought I'd share and you can laugh with us.

FBF Winner, and My First Trip to a Kohl's... aka I will Forever Expect Great Things

1. Last Free Book Friday

This Friday will be the last Free Book Friday until after the holidays! There's a chance there might be a huge blowout, and Smokey will pick more than one winner.

FBF Winner:

Nikki

Pick your top three choices from the pic below and email me your address.

2. D-Will and Kid B

Shout out to my man Deron Williams of the Jazz.
(D-Will Kickin' Arse)

I know the team is off to a rough start, but I love my D-Will. He donated 20 game tickets to the Pingree School for Autism the other night, so Kid B got to go to the game with me. Sam and Kid C bought some tix and tagged along as well. We got to sit in D-Will's Double Team section, and Kid B was totally engrossed in the game.
You can see Kid B considered the game an extension of school. He brought his backpack and wore it the whole time.
(First we make a cotton ball snowman, then we go to the Jazz Game.All in a day's work at Pingree.)

Hats off to any superstar who gives.

Of course, when the Jazz lost, we returned the ticket stubs to the team along with a note that read, "Why can't you win for the autistic children?"

I jest.
(The boys with the Jazz Dancers. They're learning early.)

3. I went to Kohl's for the first time ever the other day.

Why have I never been to this little piece of paradise on Earth before?

Cousins A and K told me about it, and I asked, "What do they have at Kohl's?" And they basically replied, "What don't they have at Kohl's?" And then we all laughed heartily and slapped fives in the air and elbowed each other in the ribs in an "if ya know what I mean" kind of way.

The rumors were true: Everything at Kohl's is on sale. To which I kept replying, "Isn't that like saying nothing at Kohl's is on sale?"

And Cousin K would remind me, "It's not the same thing as saying everyone's special, so no one is. Everything here really is on sale."

I decided to buy a pair of shoes for Kid B. Ones where there would be no foot twisting involved to get his foot in, and preferably the entire top half would lift off when it was untied so he could step on it, and the shoe would automatically enclose his foot.

Cousin K insisted they have those shoes, because they're Kohl's. She asked, "What size is he?"

me: "He's about 3 and a half year-old size."

K gives me a strange look.

me: "Okay, maybe he's more like size 4-year-old in shoes."

K: "'Size 4-year old?' Shoes are not like clothes. They have actual sizes."

me: "Say Whaaa?"

I have an almost seven year old, and an almost 4 year old. How did I not know this?

So, how's everyone's week going? Anyone excited for New Moon? Anyone finish their NaNoWriMo books?